I don't even know what happened to me yesterday. I was super excited to be starting my LHS challenge and to be buying my roller skates and I just binged. It started at noon on the way home from the skate shop with a stop at McDonalds. I was super thirsty because I was stupid and left my water bottle at home and so I thought, "Hey, may as well stop and get some something to drink" and then we get in the drive-thru and I ask my friend, because he was kind enough to drive me out to Vancouver if he wanted anything for lunch, and then I ended up getting a McChicken Meal with a Coke. Funny part is, I DON'T EVEN LIKE COKE! But I drank the whole thing and the cups at McDonalds are not small, as I'm sure lots of people know. I don't know if that was actually funny, or just tragic. Dinner was good, I had a lean pork chop with a spinach salad but almost immediately after, I ate a big bag of Cheese Puffs. And then I had a pint of Haagan-Das for dessert at 10pm.
I went through a long McDicks stage before I started my weight loss adventures and this blog. There was a time when I went to McDicks every day and got large french fries, a large root beer and two double cheeseburgers and I would eat them in my car and put the garbage straight in the outside garbage bins because I knew that if someone found them that I would feel even more ashamed than I already felt. For the longest time, there was a McDonalds cup hidden in my desk because I couldn't throw it away for fear of my mom finding it and knowing that I ate there.
I can't figure out why I keep doing this to myself. The other day I was looking at myself in the mirror and I was so happy about the progress that I've been making in my health but I keep managing to sabotage myself. My problem with eating is not really that I eat a lot to the point that I am full, but that I don't eat a lot and what I eat is garbage. I've been trying to eat more often and filling my body with fuel that I can use to become stronger and give my body the nutrients it can use, not the artificial crap that our body does not recognise as food.
Tomorrow is a new day. I did better today, but not great. My knee is still really sore from working out with Nathan the other day, I think. My eating was better today, but not fantastic. All in all, tomorrow is a new day.